Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Apparently I know how to spot a twat

Monday, June 30th, 2008

With the end of Euro 2008 (congratulations Spain on your victory) comes the end of many a fantasy football competition. This time I decided to try something different and try my hand at Fantasy Twatball. I came across Fantasy Twatball whilst browsing Spangly Princess’s blog - one of my favourite football blogs. The Fantasy Twatball site also some great illustrations that are worth checking out.

Where Fantasy Twatball differs from your normal fantasy football is that your players score points for “sundry misadventures along the lines of getting sent off, assaulting members of the public, scoring own goals and bringing the names of obscure body parts into the vocabulary of the readership of The Sun, and you get the points for all your players, and the team with the most points at the end wins”.

Anyway to cut a long story short it looks like I know how to spot a twat as I managed to pick up third place with my team of twats, and here they are:

  • Jens Lehmann
  • Marek Jankulovski
  • William Gallas
  • Khalid Boulahrouz
  • Daniele De Rossi
  • Cristian Chivu
  • Emre Belozoglu
  • Antonio Cassano
  • Helder Postiga
  • Adrian Mutu
  • Zlatan Ibrahimovic

A speck of blue in a sea of orange

Sunday, January 6th, 2008
Moments before kickoff
One should never allow an opposition supporter choose wear you sit at an away game. Last Saturday night was my second away trip to Brisbane to see the Victory take on the Queensland Roar at Suncorp Stadium. After days of rain, which I enjoyed on Stradbroke Island, Brisbane was at its balmy best for the match. I have a few friends up north who support the Roar and attend these away games with these people. Therefore I was always going to be sitting amongst opposition supporters. However, this time I was deep in enemy territory sitting in the Northern Stand barely fifty metres from “The Den”. As I made my way to our seats I was subjected to many a good natured jibe from the Roar fans.

The first half was a fairly tense affair and a pretty ordinary performance from the Victory as the Roar basically camped in our half of the pitch. I thought it was going to be a long night as the team barely created any chances and were being dominated in the midfield. There was a lot of wasted possession and long balls that went to nobody. Luckily for us, Queensland failed to take advantage of their dominance and the score remained 0-0 at half time.

With the second half came a change of mood as twice I leapt to my feet scarf raised amongst the sea of orange as we went two goals to the good. On both occasions I was on the receiving end of some projectiles, namely empty beer cups and coke bottle or two. Luckily none were full and most missed their target and no harm was done. My girlfriend, Caroline, who also joined in the celebrations, didn’t cop anything as she wasn’t wearing Victory colours. For the next 25 minutes I sat nervously as the Roar went on the attack. The crowd of just over 21,000, a season high, roared into life as Marcinho pulled one back for the Roar and also had very good claims for a penalty as Muscat appeared to handled in the box. For once this season the luck and the call went out our way and the claims were waved away. The sea of orange was livid and vented their frustrations on referee, Matthew Breeze. For the second year running I managed to walk out of Suncorp Stadium with a smile on my face.

Our finals hopes are still alive, although barely as a win or probably even a point to Newcastle in either of the final two rounds will see the official end of our chances and those of fellow 2007 grand finalists, Adelaide. Standout players for me on the night were Theoklitos, Vargas, Thompson and Hernandez with honourable mentions going to Allsopp, Ryall and Muscat. Its good to see Allsopp gaining confidence in front of goal, although to be honest its a little late in the season. Hopefully it continues through to our ACL campaign. I would like to see Hernandez and Ward both start the next game to see how they work together and unfortunately for Caceres that probably means a spell on the bench.

Next is our final home game for the season, barring an unlikely finals appearance, against Wellington. Heres hoping our winning streak continues and the guys below have some more to cheer about.

Melbourne Victory supporters
The bottom photo appears courtesy of smurfie_77 and also appears in the Victory In Melbourne Flickr Group.

Three get Socceroos call-up

Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008
Today, new Socceroos head coach Pim Verbeek picked 22 players from the A-League for a training camp to be held in Sydney next week. While not a final squad for the Qatar match, it makes for interesting reading. Three Victory players got the call up, being Muscat, Thompson and Vargas who has been rewarded for his consistency over his two seasons in the league. Disappointment must have been felt by Michael Theoklitos, who along with Covic have been the outstanding keepers of the season in the A-League.

To be honest I am a little surprised at some of the selections, with names such as Corica, Durante, Coyne, Talay, Matt Thompson and Pondeljak springing to mind. It is also worth noting that Graham Arnold has also called up fifteen players from the Olyroos squad for a camp as well. Players such as Milligan, Djite, Vukovic and Musalik in that squad would also be under consideration for the full squad. It would also provide them with excellent preparation for the Olympics. The absence of Craig Moore from the squad raises a few questions, as one would expect a player of his experience to be an automatic selection. This is reported to be the first of two camps before our first qualifying match. It will be something of interest to see if the squad changes between camps as Verbeek sees them first hand and takes in more A-League matches.

It is also interesting to read that Verbeek thinks that an all A-League squad for the Socceroos may not be up to the task of beating Qatar on February 6 and will most likely call up European-based Australians for the game. It is good to seek Verbeek not taking the Qataris lightly and demanding improvement in the local competition.

Squad: John Aloisi (Central Coast Mariners), Clint Bolton (Sydney FC), Alex Brosque (Sydney FC), Simon Colosimo (Perth Glory), Steve Corica (Sydney FC), Ante Covic (Newcastle Jets), Jamie Coyne (Perth Glory), Travis Dodd (Adelaide United), Andrew Durante (Newcastle Jets), Adam Griffiths (Newcastle Jets), Joel Griffiths (Newcastle Jets), John Hutchinson (Central Coast Mariners), Matt McKay (Queensland Roar), Kevin Muscat (Melbourne Victory), Jade North (Newcastle Jets), Lucas Pantelis (Adelaide United), Tom Pondeljak (Central Coast Mariners), Ufuk Talay (Sydney FC), Archie Thompson (Melbourne Victory), Matt Thompson (Newcastle Jets), Rodrigo Vargas (Melbourne Victory), Alex Wilkinson (Central Coast Mariners)

Victory makes for easy listening

Monday, December 31st, 2007
Being not able to get myself in front of a TV due to New Year’s Eve commitments I had to resort to listening to old friends, Zappers and Trimmers on SEN for my Victory versus Mariners football coverage. Listening to the game makes any objective comments about the game quite difficult as the boys from SEN aren’t what you would call impartial.

From what I heard it sounded like we finally put in a performance that is worth talking about and the 5-2 scoreline surely points to that. The result certainly put me in a good mood for the remainder of the night about until we had to try find a way home from the CBD. Nick Ward made his full debut for the squad and by all accounts his hard running in the midfield had a significant impact. Good performances were also put in by regular performers, Thompson and Theoklitos.

The win has huge ramifications within the A-League and mathematically we are still are chance to make the finals. The proviso on this is that we have to win our last three games and hope results go our way in the other matches. Maybe I was a little premature with my performing of the last rites on our season. Our win would have certainly pleased the guys (one Roar Fan and two SydneyFC fans) with whom I watched Sunday night’s Perth Glory/Queensland Roar match as it put the Roar on top of the ladder for the start of the new year and gives Sydney still hope of taking out the minor premiership. Wellington’s win over the Jets also keeps them in with a chance of finals. The new year will make for an interesting one in terms of the final weeks of the A-League season.

Speaking of the next three weeks, they will be extremely hectic for myself as I will be taking in all three remaining Victory games live, including two away trips, one to Brisbane and the other to Sydney. Slotted in between them will be our last home game against Wellington Phoenix. I am looking forward to the away trips, in particular the Sydney one as I have never done this trip and it will be my first time in the “away” end. So northern states, you have been warned, Victory In Melbourne is heading your way looking for some wins and a finals charge. Optimism may be returning, the next three weeks will tell.

You write fiction

Sunday, December 30th, 2007
That’s the quote attributed to Joseph Blatter that appears on the back of Foul! by Andrew Jennings (Harper Collins, 2007), probably one of the most controversial books about football every written. Jennings exposes a culture of endemic corruption that runs throughout all facets of the largest sporting body in the world, FIFA. He is particularly scathing on his main targets, Sepp Blatter and Jack Warner. Other continental federations also rate a mention and Asia’s very own Mohamed Bin Hammam cops a spray.

Both Hamish and The Football Tragic have posted excellent reviews on this book, which are probably much better than anything I can hope to write and I would be repeating much of what they have to say. I have probably the benefit of reading a slightly later edition which now includes the Jack Warner ticketing scandal of the 2006 World Cup and the VISA/Mastercard sponsorship farce that preceded that event. For those that have read the slightly early edition, it is certainly worth having a look at these couple of new chapters.

I highly recommend this book for all lovers of our beautiful game as it is a well written expose by one of the best investigative journalists going around. The first chapter is one of the most enthralling pieces of writing that I have come across. My only criticism of the book is that Jennings tends to repeat facts and stories in various parts of the book which tends to be a tad annoying at times.

If you want to keep up to date, with Andrew Jennings ongoing investigations into FIFA in both print and on film, check out Transparency In Sport.

Shameless plug

Sunday, December 23rd, 2007
Back in my not too distant past I was once told by a distinguished lady told that I had a good voice for radio. Now you can be the judge of that as I was kindly asked by Eamonn of Football In The Capital to make a guest appearance for his Christmas special on his Nearpost Radio Show. The show is going to air on Christmas Day at 6:30pm on 2XX 98.3fm. For all those outside the Canberra area, the show will be available shortly after the show as a podcast at Football In the Capital. Not only do you get hear my dulcet tones, but also the people behind Football Down Under & Beyond, The Football Tragic, MVFC Blog, The Round Ball Analyst and Totally Football. Hopefully it makes for interesting listening.

I will now take this opportunity to wish all my readers (there’s about five or six of you out there) and my fellow football bloggers a safe and festive season. May all your football teams do well in the coming year unless of course they are playing Melbourne Victory.

Tough ACL draw

Monday, December 17th, 2007
The draw for the Asian Champions League has just taken place at AFC headquarters. Melbourne Victory has been drawn in Group G alongside Chonburi FC of Thailand, Gamba Osaka of Japan and Chunnam Dragons of South Korea. This group is extremely tough and it will be a challenge for the team to get out of the group stages, remembering that only the top team qualifies for the next plus our current form isn’t providing fans with much hope.

I am looking forward to the Champions League matches as it will be a great opportunity for football fans to witness a different style of football than they normally see week in week out. I am hoping both the Japanese and Korean teams have a healthy travelling contingent as they are reknown for the great support. Lets see how they match the support of the Melbourne fans. The guys at MVFCblog have provided a brief background to the teams and how they qualified for the tournament, and I will try to give you a brief history of these teams.

Chonburi FC
Chonburi FC is from the Chonburi Province in the eastern part of Thailand and plays its home games at the Chonburi Municipality Stadium, which has a maximum capacity of 5,000. They are nicknamed the Chonburi Sharks. The club was promoted to the Thai Premier League in the 2006 after it had won the Thai Provincial League in which it had participated since 2002. The team finished ninth in their first season in the Premier League. Chonburi FC qualified for the tournament by winning the Thai Premier League comfortably by nine points from its nearest rival, Krungthai FC, in only its second season in the top flight.

Gamba Osaka
The origins of this team hark all the way back to 1980, and began life as Matsushita Industrial Electical Company Football Club. Gamba was one of the original members of the J-League in 1992 and took out its first J-League title in 2005. The team has qualified for the tournament by winning the 2007 J-League Cup and will also participate in the inaugaral Pan-Pacific Championships to be held in late February against American and Australian opposition. This will obviously gives us some indication of where we stand in terms of standard. They finished the recently completed J-League season in third place behind eventual champions, Kashima Antlers and Urawa Red Diamonds. The team is based out of the 1970 Osaka Expo Stadium which has as a capacity of 21,000 people.

Chunnam Dragons
Chunnam Dragons are based in the South Korean city of Gwangyang, and joined the K-League for the 1995 season. They have never won the K-League title with their best performance being runner-up in 1997. They have qualified for the tournament by winning the Korean FA Cup, a title which they have won previously in 1997 and 2006. They play their home games at the Gwang-Yang Stadium which has a capacity of approximately 14,000. They finished the recently completed K-League campaign in tenth position.

In mourning

Sunday, December 16th, 2007

A different kind of review

Sunday, December 9th, 2007

This week’s match review is going to be a little different as I was unable to attend my first ever Melbourne Victory home game due to clash between the game and the birthday festivities of my lovely, football-suffering girlfriend, Caroline. However I managed to keep in touch with what was going on only a few kilometres away through regular messages from fellow bloggers, Cecilia and Peter, for which I am extremely grateful. So here are the messages in chronological order that I received during the game illustrating their thoughts on the game that I thought I would share with you all and as my token effort of a review.

7:04pm
Kaz AND Hernandez starting.

7:12pm
Muscat gives away a free outside the box. Wasted as it hits an MV for a corner. Nothing comes from it really. Shit! Replay shows MV player’s hand caused the corner and he was in the box.

7:22pm
Fuck. We’re down. Controversial but I think he was on.

7:23pm
Or not. I dunno. I’ll need replays for that. Still, no one was on Agostino. . . Our funeral.

7:27pm
We’re all transporting the ball too much. Then we either pass it late so AU get it or pass it like shit because we’ve been running and out of puff.

7:35pm
0-1. Totally offside.

7:35pm
Kemp moves the microphone, cables and the kitchen sink for a corner. Shit corner as per usual.

8:12pm
Damn. Adelaide score again. EXACTLY the same goal. We don’t learn.

8:13pm
0-2 damn it.

8:17pm
Djite on for Giraldi. Oh shit. :(

8:32pm
Penalty 4 us.

8:33pm
1-2 now 20 2 go

8:34pm
1-2 Muscat penalty

8:45pm
Burns may have pulled his hamstring. :( He may also be feigning. :( :(

8:54pm
GOAL!

8:55pm
2-2 own goal

8:58pm
Full time. 2-2

9:05pm
2-2

A signing to ward off the doomsayers

Wednesday, December 5th, 2007
After a weekend of bad news, Melbourne Victory have provided us with some news that they completely haven’t lost the plot. Today, they signed Olyroo Nick Ward on what is essentially a six month deal that will see him play a part in the remainder of the season and our Asian Champions League campaign. Is this the signing that will turn our season around? Hopefully it is, although it probably may mean that one of my favourite players, Kaz Patafta may get pushed further into the background. Or am I expecting too much from such a young player. Merrick doesn’t seem to have the greatest record with young, attacking players and this is my only concern regarding this signing. The attacking midfield position is one that hasn’t really been covered this season and may require a change of system from the man in charge. This signing may also spell the demise of Brebner, who has looked out of sorts all season, in the midfield. It looks like Ward will be available for the home game against Newcastle. Maybe a sense of optimism is returning. For all the details, click here.